6/15/11

My Point of View

 
I've been discovered.

I was riding in the car with my husband when he made a curious observation.

"Are you happy?" he asked.

"Sure. I'm ok," I said.

"No, not okay. You don't have a middle ground."

I was tickled to my toes that he'd noticed.

It's true, I have no middle ground. When I'm happy, I'm deliriously thrilled. On those rare occasions when I'm angry, I'm pissed to all hell. Why? I adore the extremes. It's those unusual moments that spur the creativity of a writer. A drama should make me weep. A romance should make me want to fall in love all over again. A comedy should be so funny it makes me run to the bathroom. Here are a few noteworthy funny stories I have enjoyed the honor of experiencing.

Funny Story 1: Last year, for my birthday, my hubby took me horseback riding because I've been bugging him about it for years. I hadn't ridden a horse since I was three, at which time I peed on the unsuspecting animal. So he took me. I rode on a black horse named Storm. He, being such a tall man, was matched up to a caramel-colored horse named Snickers. Snickers was a feisty animal. If anything spooked him, the horse would flip himself around 90 degrees, but surely a man could keep him in line, or so they thought. The ride was going good. We're having fun. Something scared Snickers, so he flips himself around, assumes a hunched up position, and decides to defecate. The last thing I remember seeing through my hysterical laughter was the large form of my hubby sitting on a pooping horse.

Funny Story 2: I had a friend once. She was a New Yorker. I don't know if that had anything to do with it, but she had a mouth on her that could make a sailor blush and a biker gape (I know, I'm stereotyping). She had also recovered from a brain tumor that had damaged the left side of her body. She would fall all the time. It was normal, even expected. We'd be walking and plop, there she went. Well, we were at McDonald's one day. She ordered a double cheeseburger, fries and a drink, and insisted on carrying her own tray. Any offer to help was seen as an acknowledgement of her malfunction. So I let her carry her stuff. Well, next thing you know, she falls, and it was quite dramatic. She spun a full circle. The tray went flying, fries smacked someone in the head, pop spilled on the ground. She slipped on it, one leg went forward, the other backwards, and she wound up on a floor. It was a pirouette. And so I laughed.
After searing me with a glance, she says, "You mother*bleep*asshole, quit laughing at me."
We were friends for years, so at this point I was accustomed to her colorful retorts. "I'm not laughing at you," I said. "I enjoyed the sight of your fall. You don't understand. It was grandiose." She was able to appreciate my point of view after that.

Funny Story 3: Never take me ice skating. I was one of those deprived kids who never learned physical activity of any type, so when I turned 18, a friend of mine suggested we go ice skating. Half hour into it she was sitting on a bench engaging in a frenzied cackling. I had succeeded in falling for the umpteenth time, taking six other people down with me, and was being reprimanded by the portly woman I had landed on while kids skated around me pointing. I didn't blame my friend for laughing. To onlookers I must have been hilarious. I would have done the same in her place. Needless to say, I never went ice skating again.

Why am I posting these comical ventures? I have a mantra, one of many. "If you're going to do something, do it all the way, go for the gusto. Half-ass doesn't cut it. That goes for writing too."

Have a great day, and I hope I made you laugh at least once.

15 comments:

  1. Excellent motto. My fortune cookie said basically the same thing the other day: Approach life with bold enthusiasm.

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  2. I suffer from the occasional bout of depression. Nothing too big but it affects my husband. He can't stand to see me that way since I'm usually so happy. He advised me to seek help, meaning medication. I balked at this because I really need to feel those emotions, no matter how difficult. They helped me understand the downward spiral & plight of my protagonist. I still draw on those emotions & am grateful they have provided me with some inspiration.

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  3. L.G. My fortune cookies always tell me I have a cheerful disposition, then they tease me with loto numbers. At least one part is true

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  4. Nancy, a lot of people suffer from depression. I used to be one of them. Meditating helps. Life isn't necessarily easy. Take Hemmingway for instance, I heard he was blue a lot, not that I'm encouraging you to drink. The truth is that we writers do utilize our emotions as a form of a paintbrush.

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  5. Definitely made me smile. I felt bad for your hubs but I know I would've laughed too. :-) You remind me of my sister. She has extreme emotions and loves them. She's great. :-) I admire people who feel things strongly and can show what they feel.

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  6. HA! Funny stuff.
    I'm glad I'm not the only one who can't skate. My efforts usually end up resembling a human curling match.

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  7. Sounds like you definitely have a zest for life and see the comic in things! ;o) Enjoyed your stories. Have a great week!

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  8. Thanks Jessica. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Congrats again on your fabulous good fortune.

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  9. Bryce, I would love to compete with you in that sport...^-^...

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  10. Thanks Carol, it's always a pleasure to make someone laugh. You have a great week too!

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  11. Great stories I can relate to all of them, as I have the a bunch of horses, the bikes, and have been known to ice skate on the rare occasion. With regard to the the depression part, I too have had my stint with it as well. Mainly after my wife passed and like Laila suggested meditation is an awesome way to get through it with out the meds or booze. Then there is writing, what a terrific way to deal with life's stresses. I am so happy I started the whole writing thing. My main vent is channeled into the books, and then the rest seeps into the blog posts.

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  12. Mike,I discover something new about you every time. Didn't peg you for a guy who rides horses. I'm sorry for your loss. I'm glad you've found such strength in writing.

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  13. I just read this and yes, you made me laugh.
    I agree about the 1/2 ass stuff. All or nothing!

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  14. Thanks Desert Rocks. I'm glad you liked it.

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  15. OK, this is the kind of stuff I love.
    I have this promise that I have made to myself... I LAUGH OUT LOUD AS OFTEN AS I CAN. And if the day is not conducive to that than fake it! It's the laughter that turns the day around.........kt

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