WHAT I'VE BEEN UP TO LATELY.

Happy prelude to Friday!

I have a few things on my agenda for today.

First and foremost I'd like to take a moment and thank the three ladies who have served as my critique partners. You have made such a difference in my writing. I admire you, respect you, really like you, and am proud to share this journey with you. It's not easy to critique. Heck, it's not easy to take the time to read someone else's work when there's so much going on in life. The generosity of the writing world continues to warm my heart. Thank you all so much!

For those I have critiqued, you have amazed me with your verbiage and your imagination. I am blown away. I shudder when I visualize the world we could create if we ever put our heads together.

Next:

I won this book!

Tom has fallen for the daughter of the man who killed him, and the Non-Agency will stop at nothing to keep them apart.

Please visit Rik Davball at It's the future stupid

I absolutely love winning! Now I just have to claim it...still working on that.  First I dragged my feet because I don't have an e-reader yet and it hurts my eyes to read on the laptop.  Then I misplaced the darn code and had to email the fabulous author.  I have a huge list of books waiting to be downloaded...most of them from you guys. (Here's the time to suggest a good e-reader.)

Also:

I have been liebsterized again. Bloody hell, but much appreciated.  For a while there it felt like an epidemic of awards. I considered the possibility that the rumor about my alien powers had leaked out. Caution: You'll never take me alive! Anyway, I'm not forcing anyone to pass this award on. What I'm doing instead is mentioning a few blogs I have thoroughly enjoyed reading lately and slipping in a few random facts about me.

Blogs of note:

Why I wake up every day.  Pay unikorna a visit.  She is a unique exceptional fairy.

The Eagles Aerial Perspective  Visit Eagle.  I've never known anyone who reads so much.  She's a guru.

Mark Noce Stories Visit mark.  He's a great writer who just spent two weeks in Hawaii.

Wistful Nebulae  Go say hi to M Pax.  This sci-fi lady rocks.

Abstract Pictures  Go check out Leovi.  His pictures take my breath away. (Yes I translated and shortened the name of his blog.)

Some brief facts about me:

1. I almost drowned when I was 2, lifted my hands up, saw the light at my fingertips and was pulled out of the water by my father just in time.

2. I have a thing for older men, result of spending years reading historical romances...hence the 10 year age difference between my husband and myself.  I still don't get cougars. 

3. I like walking barefoot, so much in fact I've developed a few callouses.  My wedding video included an unwarranted closeup of my feet.

4.  When I was 10 my father was mugged and left for dead.  He's alive, but I haven't been comfortable with going out on my own since then.

5. I have the tendency of being too honest.  And sometimes people don't want to hear the truth.

This liebster was brought to you by:

Kathy at http://imagine-today1.blogspot.com/   

Finally:

Next week I will be posting only on Wednesday...because that is "Insecure Writer's Day."

  Hosted by the great Alex J Cavanaugh.  (Funny fact: Alex's is the only guy's blog my husband ever remembers me visiting.)

I wasn't able to participate in the session due to the partying week I took off on my birthday. Not only am I looking forward to my own "begging for empathy session", I'm real eager to read what's bugging every other writer out there. Alex, I hope you have the links posted on your site...I might not be following everyone yet.

Oh, and if anyone isn't following Alex yet, please do. I'm dying to know if he'll keel over once he reaches 1000 followers. :)

See you all Wednesday. Have a great weekend! Keep living the dream!

...^-^....

I wish you all tons of inspiration.  Here's a lovely picture to send you on your way.

DOGGIE DILEMMA

PROFILE: DeeDee. Golden Sheltie. AKA: Princess Deedra, Flower Pot, Butterscotch Cutie, Buttercup, and the occasional poop head. Loves to lay out in the yard. Kisses have been known to taste like poop and candy. Guilty of: Ripping up tissue, eating receipts, and pooping on the carpet right in front of Pet-human and Man-servant for failure to decipher canine dialect. Averted punishment by accurate usage of puppy-dog-eye technique. Alpha dog, but I won't hike my leg.

PROFILE: Stryker. By-black Sheltie. AKA: Nasty little crotch sniffer, indecent leg licker, little poop head, Spud, Hairy little turd butt, and others. Loves to be cuddled at all times. Has been known to try and tongue-bathe Pet-human. Guilty of: Stealing chicken bones out of the garbage. Licking the wooden floor. Emitting loud hacking noises that have caused Pet-human to shoot out of bed to preserves what's left of the carpet. Averted punishment by accurate usage of rub-belly technique. Beta dog, and proud of it.

DOGGIE DILEMMA: Enter Dogs.

DEEDRA: Attention Bloggers, our pet-human is SOL.

STRYKER: You mean MIA.

DEEDRA: I mean SOL. You used your body to trip her. She nearly fell down the stairs.

STRYKER: Don't say that out loud! Besides, it was the only way I could keep her away from the computer.

DEEDRA: Quiet. I have to tell them about the "C" word.

STRYKER: You mean the cat?

DEEDRA: We don't have a cat.

STRYKER: Well we should. The scent of feline anus is a delicacy.

DEEDRA: Cat-ass-sniffer. No wonder we found you at the pound.

STRYKER: You eat poop. Ow!

DEEDRA: Cholesterol. The word is cholesterol.

STRYKER: I still don't know what it is.

DEEDRA: Me neither, but apparently it happens when you consume too much pizza and wine. Pet-human had a test done because she's obsessed with being healthy. And hers is up by four points.

STRYKER: I don't know what the deal is. The man-servant's is much higher and he doesn't complain.

DEEDRA: Of course not, he's male. Anyway, pet-human needs to eat healthier.

STRYKER: But she gives us the crust...

DEEDRA: And we have forced her to move her regular Friday post to Thursdays so she can resume her rigorous exercise regiment...with the exception of Insecure Writer's day on October 5th. There, I've said it all. Now for a few words from out sponsor. Pet-human wrote this for the campaign challenge. She didn't enter the contest but wrote it just for fun. And they made her use some weird words. (imago, miasma, lacuna, oscitate, synchronicity, and mirror.) 200 WORDS.  Check it out.

                                                                            ***

FURRY IMAGO

　

Knee deep in swamp water, Troy boded his time. The miasma cleared forming a mirror in the chilling stream. He didn’t dare look down and face the reflection of his furry imago. Saliva spilled from the corner of his mouth. The swing moved, hypnotizing him with the sight of the lithe girl kicking up her toes. He licked his lips. An unnatural whine oozed from his throat. He swallowed it. It was happening again. He was losing control of his human side. As leader of the pack he was expected to show restraint when it came to eating humans, but the hunger lured him like the harvest moon. All sense of guilt or propriety laid buried deep within a minuscule lacuna in his brain.

The girl leaped off the swing, making him oscitate. He darted toward her, landing at her feet—sparing a moment of adoration before trapping her in his embrace. Teeth sunk into flesh, muffling a scream. The fierce synchronicity became a type of music. Once again he gorged on human elixir, denying his upbringing, favoring the wolf. No matter, the others would never find out. He shook the dew from his fur and returned to his pack.

　                                                ***

DEEDRA: Hope you liked it.  She wrote if with us in mind.

STRYKER: Tell them the trivia.

DEEDRA: Fun facts.  It has been scientifically proven that all dogs evolved from wolves.  Selective breeding provided the physical variety.

STRYKER: Uh-oh, here she comes!

DEEDRA: Run!

Exit dogs, tails curled behind them in a wagging frenzy as they proceed to run the fence line.

Have a great week everyone! ...^-^... See you Thursday.  Love your poochies.

　

　

FABULOUS FAKE FRIDAY

You are not trapped in time loop. This is Friday's post. 

You guys should know by now that I get tired of following my own rules.  Besides, it's kinda fun to create confusion.  Did you ever have something stuck in your head and you couldn't stop thinking about it until you wrote it down? Well, here you have it.  Welcome to my brain.  Ooh, and check out my cartoon self.  Yup, that is definitely what I look like in my otherworldly state.

My husband called me "short" the other day. At his 6'5 stature the comment didn't come as a surprise. As a matter of fact, the sweet, cradle-robbing darling calls me that often, even though I've explained to him countless times that God crams us into small packages to hide the brilliance of our souls. (Hear that fun-sized people?) Of course he's in denial. Still, his remark brought to mind the memory of my trouble adapting to symbiosis. ( The interaction between two different organisms living in close physical association, typically to the advantage of both. AKA: Adapting to life as an Earthling.)

I once looked like this: Fabulous alien self.



Then I hopped into something that looked kinda like this: Couldn't find picture of baby Earthling self.

During the long, arduous adjustment period I looked a little something like this: Ugly duckling, which is actually remarkable cute.



I was the kid that got picked on, the loner, the one that didn't open her mouth from fear of being ridiculed. I had no sense of fashion, doubted myself beyond reason, and always did what I was told up to the point where I didn't do anything I wanted to do. Merging with a host is tricky business. I can clearly remember living in my head. And in there life was rich...so much in fact that it developed into a great Fantasy. And that Fantasy poured into books.

I've often been asked why I write Fantasy and not another genre that might allegedly make me more money. Oh, I could go into great detail, but the answer is real simple. A great story told in a fantastical way is the signature of my soul. And we all have our own unique signatures. We are as varying as the stars.

So now that I'm most comfortable in my wonderful self, I'm going to cut this Friday post short and invite you all to celebrate being you. And in doing that, I'm leaving you one question to take with you and ponder.

What's the number one reason why you love being you?

Now shine like a star.

Happy Friday everyone and an even better weekend. ...^-^...

WORST MOVIES EVER BLOGFEST

This awesome blogfest is being hosted by Alex over at Alex J Cavanaugh

I like to be entertained, and movies are a great way to achieve that goal.  Still, some movies really suck.  Here are a few that made me curse in several languages.

1. KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE.

Aliens who look like clowns come from outer space to terrorize a small town.  Are you freakin kidding me?  This was the most God-awful movie I've ever watched. 

2. MARS ATTACKS.

The Earth is invaded my Martians.  They torture and kill.  Okay, I know a lot of people liked this movie, but I have to disagree.  (My husband still makes me do the alien voices.)  I don't care how many top paid actors or good-looking Pierce Brosnans you stick in there, I really hated this movie.

3. WORLD'S GREATEST DAD.

A comedy about a man who learns that the things you want most may not be the things that make you happy, and that being lonely is not necessarily the same as being alone.  This is not a comedy.  It is a depressing movie.  I love Robin Williams in everything else except this.  His son is obnoxious.  The best part of the movie was the end because it's all about a writer who wants to be published.  Seriously, if you're going to watch it, fastforward to the end.

4. Bewitched

Everyone knows the show, right?  The cute witch marries the human.  I loved the show.  Then they went and made this movie with Will Ferrell acting like an idiot.  The witch wasn't even called Samantha.  Pisses me off when they mess with a good thing.  The only plus of this movie was Shirley MacLain as Andora, but I like her in all her movies.

5. INDECENT PROPOSAL.

A woman cheats on her husband for a million dollars.  Seriously, this is supposed to be a cool movie?  Granted there's a lot of money involved.  And Robert Redford is hot, but come on.  Then at the end she goes back to her husband and they start over like if nothing happened.  The whore cheated on you and you agreed to it for money.  You pimped her out you schmuck.  Yeah, I did't care for this movie.

6. KINGPIN.

A star bowler whose career was prematurely "cut off" hopes to ride a new prodigy to success and riches.  All with me now.  "Stupid.  Stupid."  I used to like Woody Harrelson until I was coersced into watching this movie.  It was plain disgusting.  How do writers come up with this crap?  (Man, I'm a harsh critic.)

7. THE CABLE GUY



A lonely and disturbed cable guy raised on television just wants a new friend, but his target, a designer, rejects him, with bad consequences.  Let me start by saying that Jim Carrey usually makes me laugh, but I thought he was the biggest jackass in this movie, which probably means he played the part well.  Still, the movie made my crap list.

8.  THE BROTHER FROM ANOTHER PLANET.







A mute alien is chased by outer-space bounty hunters through the streets of Harlem in this thought-provoking cult classic.  (Thought-provoking my ass.)  Yeah, I was wondering why he couldn't talk, why an alien would be an idiot, and why the heck he snorted coke?  As a sworn Sci-Fi lover, I felt betrayed.

9. FREDDY GOT FINGERED.

An unemployed cartoonist moves back in with his parents and younger brother Freddy. When his parents demand he leave, he begins to spread rumors that his father is sexually abusing Freddy.  This is just plain sick, and I value myself as having an open mind.  I lasted five minutes with this movie and counted it as a not worthy of anything.  I apologize for even mentioning it.

10. VAMPIRES SUCK.



A spoof of vampire-themed movies, where teenager Becca finds herself torn between two boys. As she and her friends wrestle with a number of different dramas, everything comes to a head at their prom.  I normally like spoofs.  This one sucked, literally.  Of course, without Leslie Nielsen, no spoof will ever be the same again.


Well, that's all folks.  Hope everyone enjoyed my picks.  Hate on.

Have a Happy Monday.  ...^-^...

My Gratitude

Hello all and Happy Friday!

I was hopping through the campaigners and it occured to me that many are selling, promoting, and building their numbers. I don't have a darn thing to offer except my friendship.  Maybe it's just that life moves so fast, and I see Blogger in a different light. To me it's become an opportunity to meet like-minded people, writers that have set out on my same journey. I hate to rush it, strive for the numbers and not stop to get a feel for and get to know all of you as individuals. It seems a shame otherwise, but that's just me.

So in my own mushy way I'd like to take this moment to recongnize a few of my oldest blogger friends who were with me from the beginning, and others who have touched my heart in one way or another. Don't worry, I'll try to keep it brief. (Swampland anybody?)

　

Cheryl over at Kangaroos in the Scrubby Bush  (tells a tale of cute kangaroos) and Lisa at Lisa L Regan (awesome thriller writer) gave me this award.  Thank you so much ladies.  Sorry it's taken me so long to pass this on.


And Cheryl (fellow Fantasy writer) over at http://offwithefairies.blogspot.com/ also stuck me...er...gifted me with this one.I'm going to cheat like a wayward spouse and combine these all in the sake of hating long blogs.  (There's no way I'm going through all this copy and paste again.)

Most Beautiful : Finnegan the Squirrel  Captures the essence of nature. And he's a cute little booger.

Most Controversial : Free Sex Advice It was supposed to be advice on how to write sex scenes without being too explicit.  It was inspired by the lovely Donna Weaver from Weavin a Tale or Two, and was also the time I thought I had scared Alex at Alex J Cavanaugh away for good.  Thank you Donna.  And Alex, I'm glad you came back.  I'd miss you. You are both way cool.

Most Popular : Happy Birthday to Me.  74 birthday wishes and counting made my day extra special. 

Most Helpful : Genre Map  It's a clicky thingy that helps you determine your genre.  (I hope the darn thing still works.)

Most Surprisingly successful : Being Present  All about spending time with your loved ones and giving yourself a break from the social media.  With so many Blogger addicts here (myself included) I thought it would bomb.  I appreciate your attention to this blog. 

Most Underrated : Panty Meme  Smutty as all hell, I admit it.  I had fun with it.  And plenty of you stopped by (fellow closet freaks).  And it made it's way around like wild fire.  Even L.G. over at Barbs and Prophets played and Carrie at So You're a Writer.  Mike, I appreciated your participation the most.  (Spidey)  Protect the Risen

Most Prideworthy : Ginger (Crime Fiction)  It didn't get tons of hits, but I found it very special.  It was also the first day Rusty at Blutonian Death Egg stopped by my blog and tipped his hat to me.  (Very cute comment.) I also appreciated seeing Lisa, above and Nancy at Nancy Thompson.

I'd like to pass on this award to all those mentioned above as well as to Eve at The Desert Rock and Bryce over at The Preservation Society eventhough he's AWOL.  A lot of these people were with me when I had no one to come and comment.  They stopped by to say hi.  And they cared.

I've met so many wonderful individuals since then like Botanist at Views from the Bald Patch, Roland at  Writing in the Crossairs, Joylene at   Joylene Nowell Butler , Isis at  Isis Rushdan, PK at Pk Hrezo, Julie at  Gypsy in my Soul ...I could go on and on.  I am proud to call you my blogger buds.  These awards go to each and everyone of you.  You don't have to do a darn thing...just pay the three ladies up top a visit and say hi.

Now, ten random facts about me and I will make them brief.

1. My middle name is Angelica. (Bet you had no clue.)
2. Most kids have a comfort toy.  Mine was a long-haired blonde doll.  I tore out her eyes and dragged her around by her hair. (Till this day I never had kids of my own.)
3. I had a baby chick once.  Years later my mother told me I ate it in soup.  (Scarred me for life)
4. I wear white socks with everything, unless I'm dressed up of course.  I also carry a black purse. (Both go great with hot pink) 
5. I'm a morning person, pisses people off, but they remark they miss me when I'm gone.
6. I like the dark.  I will shut windows, turn off lights, tv, the works.  (My inner vampire at work.)
7. I don't believe in buying $300.00 shoes.  There's starving people out there.
8. I've seen my share of ghosts ever since I was three.  (Scoff if you must.)
9. I can't stand parties...not when there's so much more I'd rather be doing. (However, after a glass of wine I'm good to go and can BS with the best of them.)
10. I secretly dream of being beamed out into a cool spaceship by sexy aliens.  (Oh, wait, that's no secret.)

There you have it.  Hope everyone has a wonderful day and I'm looking forward to getting to know all my new followers.  Happy blogging.

...^-^...

 

TOP OF THE MORNING.

Good morning fellow visionaries on this wonderful journey called life.  I want to start by thanking all of you for all the birthday wishes. (BTW: I’m 4338 in alien years.)  And proud of it.

I’d like to welcome all my new followers.  I spent a few hours Saturday visiting you and getting to know you.  Please email me if you’re following me but I’m not following you.  A whole week without blogging can throw a person off. 

I’m sitting here sipping a glass of red wine on a Sunday, which by the way goes wonderfully with pizza, and reminding myself that this is in fact the last day of my vacation and this post will go public Monday morning.  Soon I’ll be forced to use the left side of my brain.  Whose idea was it that we were only to have two-day weekends?  Ugh, somebody pay me to be on vacation.

Now, if you must know, I’m going to tell you anyway, I went camping.  And at this second I find that I miss communing with nature, reading a good book, cementing my hatred of mosquitoes, and going on long walks.

I survived a whole week away from Blogger and remembered something about myself.  I freaking love life and doing all the physical stuff.  So I’m eliminating my Wednesday posts with the exception of the Insecure Writer’s Group and other special functions.  (Suck it up...I'm still here.)  This should give me more time for blog-hopping, writing, living life, and other stuff.

I will be posting Mondays and Fridays.

On a second note, I learned a few things this week.

1. Reading does in fact spark creativity.  I read two books.  (Not naming titles.)

The first was a Fantasy.  It had about a hundred characters in it. (Does anyone remember hearing that we should only have a few characters to make it easier for the reader to follow the story?  Yup, still sounds like a load of crap to me.)  Don’t tell me what I can or can’t read.

The second book was a Paranormal Romance.  It started with a prologue.  Yes, I’ll say it again…pro-logue.  Also, it had sex galore.  I mean let-me-slap-you-across-the-face-with-it sex.  (Eat your hearts out agents.)  Worse still, I found myself so annoyed with the constant sex that I skimmed over some of it to read the other parts of the story.  Yes me, I did that.  I must be getting old (4338 doesn’t seem that bad in theory) but heck, these people were going at it like bunnies. (Cute fuzzy critters that have the ability to hop and…never mind.)  Anyway, I’m feeling cheated.  Granted, rules were meant to be broken, but if they’re going to set up literary rules, either apply them to everyone or shut up about it.

2. Now, before I go any further, I’d like to take a moment to thank Thomas Crapper. (The guy who was credited with inventing indoor plumbing.)  When I got home, lifted the toilet seat cover and there was nothing looking back at me, I felt elated. (Johnny on the Spot be dammed.)  Special recognition to the Chinese for toilet paper.

2. Next, it has come to my attention that fish have evolved to the point where they use humans for sport.  They’ve obviously been injected with a wonder drug.  Seriously, bluegills have a superior IQ.  They gather in groups around the lure and talk about us.  A teacher fish instructs them in the ways of nipping at a curly tail without swallowing.  They follow the lure around while laughing and calling us “stupid humans.”  Occasionally, they will sacrifice themselves for the sake of a pathetically skinny Earthling.  Needless to say, I didn’t catch a single one.

4. Finally and most important, there’s always room for a dog on a camping trip.  Not only are they willing to taste my food to ensure I’m not poisoned, (with the exception of wine and chocolate) they will sleep at the foot of the bed to help perfect my night vision when I’m trying to find my way to the bathroom, consume large amounts of grass to teach me the importance of eating greens, and force me to wake up at 6:30AM to pick up their poop while getting some well-needed exercise. 

There.  I hope my words of wisdom have given all of you a reason to wake up in the morning.  I look forward to chatting with all of you.  Wish me luck.  After Monday, today, I might need another vacation.

 EXTRA CREDIT IF YOU READ THIS.

I joined the campaign and there seems to be this challenge thing going around, 200 words of flash fiction and it starts with opening a door.  I'm a Fantasy writer, and I don't normally writer about fairies, but here goes.

                                                     ***                                                                     

The door swung open.  Out walked Aura all dressed for battle.  For years they’d laughed at her wayward ideas and childish antics, not realizing it was all part of her power.  It took a rich level of whimsy to remain strong enough to battle the dream reapers, demons who captured human souls while they slept.  As a fairy trapped in a mortal body she alone possessed the key that would lead her to the underworld where the souls were kept.   

She surveyed the room focusing on all the familiar faces.  “Who’s with me?”

A green man-boy hobbled forward.    He was a Zeleak, a dark fairy forced to squeeze himself inside a fleshy being to repay past mistakes.

“I’m Neffle,” he said.  “I’ll go with you.”

She reached out and took his hand.  “Brave boy, you and I will scour the underworld together and free these people from the tyranny of the Moors.  When we return our debt will be repaid.  We’ll be free to sink into the Earth and become part of nature.”

They walked out.  Silence followed like a flag of truce.  The door closed.

***

                                           My PC insists that was 200 words.

Bloody hell, whose idea was it that I give up Wednesdays anyway?  This makes for a long blog with no pictures.  Hmm, I'll take care of that.

There now.  Don’t hate, pollinate, and when that fails just copulate.  It’s a great stress reliever.

Have a great one, and cheers!   …^-^…

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Stop counting my candles.

Yes, yes, it's true.  Several years ago today, the Earth and I came to an agreement that she would let those Aliens drop me off and bless her with my presence.

My Earth parents are still not buying the story.  My mother insists the hours of premature labor and c-section were not imaginary.  I explained to her that my alien physiology wouldn't allow her body to carry me to full term.  And there is the difference in blood type. (XXX) No wait, that's not blood.

Anyway, wish me happy birthday.  I'll get so excited I might pee my pants...but let's hope not. 

IMPORTANT: I WILL BE OFF NEXT WEEK.  YOU WILL NOT SEE ME AT ALL.  I WILL NOT BE POSTING.  I'M TAKING THE WHOLE WEEK AWAY FROM HERE AND WORK TO CELEBRATE MY BIRTHDAY.  I WILL MISS YOU ALL. 

REASONS TO EMAIL ME:

1. You're reading my book. (Please do email me.)
2. I'm reading your book.  (Ditto)
3. You like me.  (Sure.)
4. Something incredibly cool is happening and I need to know right away.  (Please do.)
5. You heard a funny joke or feel like chatting and can't stand another day without me.  (Ok,if you really must...)
6. My bloggerly presence makes you horny.  (Not a good idea.  Hubs wouldn't like it.)  

SERIOUSLY, IF BY SOME CHANCE YOU WOULD LIKE TO CONTACT ME, SEND ME AN EMAIL.  I LOVE EMAILS AND DO CHECK MY PHONE ON A REGULAR BASIS.


                                   Have a fantastic week!


                                                      ...^-^...